I'd been hearing good things about Optima batteries, so I ended up buying one of their Red-Tops. Optima batteries cost about 50% more than any other brand ($130 for the 34/78), but their coil-cell design is supposed to last at least twice as long as traditional plate-cell batteries. And the grey and red "6-pack" case looks really cool. :)
It would have taken an hour (and $6) for Pep-Boys to replace the battery for me, so I decided to do it myself. I mean, how hard could it be?
I discovered just how hard it could be, if you don't have some special tools. The battery on the Caprice is held in place by a single bolt, but it's located about 8 inches down between the battery and the coolant surge tank. There's only about 2 or 3 inches between the two, the absolute minimum space needed to operate the ratchet on a socket wrench. It took a lot of work to get the battery off, and almost as much to put it back on.
Then I discovered that the battery they sold me was the smaller of the two sizes available for my car. The difference between the two was only $10, but the bigger battery had a whopping 20 minutes more reserve capacity and 90 more cranking amps. So it was back over to Pep Boys to exchange the battery.
This time, I also picked up a long extension bar for my socket wrench, so reinstalling the battery the second time around was an absolute breeze, taking me under 5 minutes.