Well, it looks like the National Weather Service was wrong AGAIN, not a drop of rain in sight, so the gardener will be dropping by today.
It's going to cost $250 to get the front and back yards under control. At this point I really don't have any choice. I don't think my grandfather's old lawnmower would be able to handle foot-high grass, and trying to use a weed-wacker on a few thousand square feet of grass is like trying to shave with a pair of tweezers.
Fortunately, after this, it's going to be a lot cheeper. A mere $80 a month will cover weeding, mowing, raking, trimming, pruning, sweeping, everything. (I don't think it covers fertilizing, but that's a dump-pellets-into-spreader-and-run-around-the-lawn-for-5-minutes thing.)
Why not do it myself? For one, I hate gardening. Always have. And then there's the fact that I know practically nothing about it. I know the difference between grass and trees, but I don't know how short the grass should be cut, or when to use fertilizer or how much or what kind, or how to properly prune a tree, or what the heck de-thatching is.
If I had the money, I'd replace all the grass with Astroturf. Looks good year-round, never needs mowing, never needs watering, weed and insect resistant.
If you woke up and I was in bed with you, what would be your first thought?
The gardener came by while I was at work.
I was just blown away at the difference. You don't realize just how bad things get until they're completely cleared away.
Nearly TWENTY cans and bags of yard waste along the side of the house. Thank God for curbside recycling!
Where the clover had grown the deepest, there are now large bare patches. I sprayed the entire lawn with a bottle of liquid "weed & feed" to encourage the grass and discourage the clover. I may see about buying a small bag of grass seed and trying to resow the area to give things a jump start.
When I got home, there were crows all over the back yard. That means the gardener must have stirred up the bugs, so I also sprayed some insecticide over the lawn and on the badly neglected orange tree. (The trees bear more fruit than I can use, so it's either given to the neighbors or it rots. Unfortunately, no neighbors have asked for any fruit, probably because they were as scared of the yard as I was, and I didn't have the gardener to go through and clean up the fallen fruit)
1. WHAT IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME?
2. WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING?
NO PANTS! Woohoo!
3. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
4. DEAD OR ALIVE, NAME THREE PEOPLE YOU WOULD LOVE TO MEET.
Albert Einstein. Dunno who else.
5. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW?
58.1F and 73% humidity. Overcast.
8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED WITH ON THE PHONE?
Some schmuck trying to sell toner.
9. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Their build (skinny, zaftig, etc)
10. SHOES YOU LOVE TO WEAR.
I usually wear steel-toed butt-kicking boots. ;)
11. HOW ARE YOU TODAY?
12. FAVORITE DRINK?
Sweet iced tea.
13. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
I'm a teetotaler.
14. FAVORITE SPORTS?
Football (that's American football, the one with the goofy looking ball)
15. HAIR COLOR?
16. EYE COLOR?
17. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Can't stand anything touching my eyes.
18. TYPE OF VEHICLE YOU DRIVE.
1995 Chevrolet Caprice SS, heavily modified.
19. TOP FIVE FAVORITE FOOD?
20. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
In the theater, Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
At home, the MST3K version of Sidehackers
21. TOP THREE PET PEEVES.
People who take to long to do something simple.
People who don't think of others.
Stupidity in general.
22. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
23. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS BETTER?
Unfortunately "scary movies" now days are just hack and slash gorefests. Bleah. :P
24. WINTER, SPRING, SUMMER, FALL?
25. HUGS OR KISSES?
Hugs for friends, kisses for special friends. :)
26. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
I prefer relationships, with privileges. ;)
27. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
28. THREE ANIMALS YOU WANT TO OWN.
29. NAME FOUR PLACES YOU HAVE ALWAYS WANTED TO VISIT.
Hetch Hetchy & the Grand Canyon of the Tuolumne.
30. FIRST CONCERT YOU EVER WENT TO?
Never been to a concert
31. LIVING ARRANGEMENTS?
Currently alone in my grandparent's house.
32. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?
In between books at the moment, will probably start Felix Salten's Fifteen Rabbits
33. WHAT IS ON YOUR SCREEN SAVER AT HOME?
My screensaver is pretty tame, just an alpha dim. My wallpaper is a rather spoogy piece of Dr. Comet bunny pr0n. Woohoo.
34. FAVORITE CARTOON?
Chip & Dale's Rescue Rangers. (Gadget was SOOOOO hot!)
35. FAVORITE SMELLS.
36. SMELLS YOU HATE.
Anything rotten or decayed.
37. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?
"D'oh, I'd rather stay in bed with my bunny."
38. FAVORITE THING YOU LIKE ABOUT THE SINGLE LIFE.
I don't like being alone.
39. HOW DO YOU EAT AN OREO?
Take 2 Double-Stuf Oreos, twist them apart, and put the two filling sides together to make a Quadruple-stuffed Oreo.
40. WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND TO THIS BLOG?