January 18th, 2009

Cooking - Hell's Kitchen


The actual e-mail I sent to the QA manager of a seafood company:

I purchased from Costco a two-pack of Nantucket Supreme Miso Crusted Salmon with Whole Grain Noodles and Vegetables.  I prepared one of the packages according to the microwave directions on the box.  At first I was disappointed by the very small portion size, but this actually turned out to be a good thing.  The fish STUNK.  The stench permeated the noodles and vegetable making them almost inedible as well.  This was one of the worst seafood meals I’ve ever had.  I couldn’t eat any more and fed the rest to the dog.  She loved it, but then again, she loves eating dead things she finds on the lawn.  I’ve still got one box left.

Homer in the Land of Chocolate

The Land of Chocolate....

I found out that all the local Cost Plus World Markets are going out of business.  I'd been buying weird candy and stuff from them for a while, so I decided to stock up on all the unusual chocolate I'd never be able to buy again without driving to their closest store in Des Moines.  I bought:

Lindt 70% dark chocolate Cherry & Chili
Valor 70% dark chocolate with Banana
Vosges 55% dark chocolate Red Fire Bar (ancho & chipotle chilies and cinnamon)
The Tea Room 58% dark chocolate Green Earl Grey Tea
The Tea Room 30% white chocolate Chamomile & Honey
World Market 64% dark chocolate with Sea Salt
3400 Phinney 40% milk chocolate Coconut Curry
3400 Phinney 65% dark chocolate French Bread & Chocolate
Niederegger 50% dark chocolate-covered marzipan
6 tubes of Smarties (65% milk chocolate)
Bellagio Sipping Chocolate
World Market Mexicocoa Drinking Chocolate (cinnamon, nutmeg, clove, allspice)
Three 3-packs of Great Bite mints (like a cross between Altoids and Tic-Tacs)